I'm still feeling pretty sore from the weekend but I knew I needed to get a good effort in today to loosen the legs and get an idea of how things will pan out for CHIN. I got home from work and slept until 5:30 which gave me just enough time to get ready and head out to the tuesday night rr, I'm surprised I woke up that early without an alarm. Looking back at tonight's effort, I feel confident and not so confident at the same time, let me explain. During tonight's club race on the Niagara Classic course I felt great, legs were good, breathing was under control and I was very responsive. However, there were a couple times where we would drive the pace super hard for a bit and I would get shelled, I think it happened twice. I fought hard to get back in the group and having my team mate Chown drop back a bit to give me that last pull back in to the group helped a ton because the last 50m or so away from the slip stream is the hardest to bridge, thanks man.
There was a group of two out front, Holtzman and Hopkins, and it took us quite some time to bridge. Once we caught them everyone sat up and I attacked and had a pretty big gap for a little while, that got shut down before our third time up Saylor's. Last lap Chown told me he was going to attack and I was to sit in and wait for the catch then go, a pretty standard team move that I just wasn't getting at all previously. He launched into a massive head wind and got a good gap quick, the small peloton that was left started echelonning and I was feeling good, pulled through every time while a few others were fading and just hanging on. I knew I would have a good kick once we caught him.
The deciding move of the race came when we caught him and as I was getting ready to go on the left Perry was going on the right so I got around the group, grabbed his wheel and we peaced. Maybe I did a little more work than I should have but I was feeling good and I really wanted to get away, and we did. Hopkins bridged before the bottom of Saylor's but faded halfway up where Chown came flying by on his cross bike and ran out of road before he could catch Perry, I thought Perry's attack was a little too soon on the climb but he had the legs to hold everyone off, nice.
In other news, I bought a dog, a border collie/lab mix, he's black with brown paws. I'm picking him up Friday after work, then it's a ballin' 2 weeks vacation! First week will be spent in Gravenhurst where I'm hoping to get a solid 4 pre-rides at Buckwallow and a long ass road ride before race day, the week after will be a big week at home, there will be a ride out to Hamilton to climb a few times.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Raccoon Rally - CX, I mean XC
Breakfast consisted of an egg, a waffle, a fruit salad, toast with PB&Banana and a spoon full of some pasty oatmeal that created a very disturbing look on my face. Paps showed up with my mom at the race site, some chatting, reg, bike prep and some spinning around; ready to go.
I was feeling pretty comfortable off the start, AD took the lead and I sat in about 8th wheel, from the start of the first climb I knew it was going to be a long day. Pretty much a 30 minute grind and loosing spot after spot after spot. I lost a couple more at the top but I was hoping for some singletrack to make up some ground, well, back down on DT and back up again, it was very similar to the layout of the road course. I found my rhythm near the end of the first lap and started making up ground, I bombed down the only twisty descent and made up 2 more spots there. One of those spots I gained by taking the line that goes straight off a rock drop instead of going around it, I was riding smooth today, strong, not so much.
My bike was making a funny high pitch sound right from the start but I blocked it out and pressed on, after the descent I had massive break rub in the back and it didn't go away. I stopped real quick where our rents were feeding to see what was going on but lost 6 spots so I hopped back on to chasse. I caught them 2 minutes later and attacked, only one guy came with me and we were pretty close for the next half lap, we caught two guys then I dropped him when I saw another guy just ahead. I faught real hard but it's tough to close gaps on the downhill, bombed through the DH and rolled in for 22nd overall and 1st in my age cat, got a set of Kenda Karma tires, not too bad.
It was an awesome weekend of racing, I would have liked today's race to be a little more epic with some mountain bike features but it was tough none the less. The weather was perfect, a little humid but at least the sun was hiding most of the time.
Huge shout out to the De Cal's for the hotel room and driving me around, much appreciated. AD had two solid rides and seems ready for S1/2 on Thursday, should be an interesting race to see. Big props to Chown for the win.
Just a thought, maybe I'm a roadie?
I was feeling pretty comfortable off the start, AD took the lead and I sat in about 8th wheel, from the start of the first climb I knew it was going to be a long day. Pretty much a 30 minute grind and loosing spot after spot after spot. I lost a couple more at the top but I was hoping for some singletrack to make up some ground, well, back down on DT and back up again, it was very similar to the layout of the road course. I found my rhythm near the end of the first lap and started making up ground, I bombed down the only twisty descent and made up 2 more spots there. One of those spots I gained by taking the line that goes straight off a rock drop instead of going around it, I was riding smooth today, strong, not so much.
My bike was making a funny high pitch sound right from the start but I blocked it out and pressed on, after the descent I had massive break rub in the back and it didn't go away. I stopped real quick where our rents were feeding to see what was going on but lost 6 spots so I hopped back on to chasse. I caught them 2 minutes later and attacked, only one guy came with me and we were pretty close for the next half lap, we caught two guys then I dropped him when I saw another guy just ahead. I faught real hard but it's tough to close gaps on the downhill, bombed through the DH and rolled in for 22nd overall and 1st in my age cat, got a set of Kenda Karma tires, not too bad.
It was an awesome weekend of racing, I would have liked today's race to be a little more epic with some mountain bike features but it was tough none the less. The weather was perfect, a little humid but at least the sun was hiding most of the time.
Huge shout out to the De Cal's for the hotel room and driving me around, much appreciated. AD had two solid rides and seems ready for S1/2 on Thursday, should be an interesting race to see. Big props to Chown for the win.
Just a thought, maybe I'm a roadie?
Raccoon Rally - Road
Climbing, climbing and more climbing pretty much sums up both days. Here's a little recap;
The morning started off less than ideal where it wasn't for sure that we were even going, by 7 we were out the door and a little behind schedule. Got to the race site just after 9 with enough time to sign up, get the number pinned, suit up and ride to the start. I rode down the road for 15 seconds to see if my legs could even turn the crank arms, it'll have to do.
The first climb was a little bit of a shock and I decided to do a little attack and found myself off the front for a bit, once I got back in I started following everything that went and by the top I was hoping we would start going down soon because I was red-lining pretty bad. De Cal should be able to post up some better descriptions of the climb when he checks his Garmin file. It was LONG, not so much steep, there's nothing like that around here. The descent was pretty tamed and I felt like shit starting the second climb.
I survived, we'll put it that way, sat in the whole time and anyone that attacked I would wait for someone to come by and grab their wheel to bridge. The second climb was a little shorter than the first one but it was steeper because I was barely in my 39T on the first climb but I found myself in it a few times on the second climb. I was relying on a super-high cadence to hang on because I couldn't find any power. Back down and around to where we started and it was time to do it again.
The race was two laps of climb, descend, climb, descend. There was no time spent in the valley at all to get the legs ready to go up, but before starting the second lap it was flat for a k or 2. I felt much better going up the first climb for the second time, when attacks were going I felt much more responsive, De Cal was going with or shutting down anything. Anytime I would go off the front with a couple guys it was guaranteed that when I looked back it was De Cal effortlessly closing down the gap (at least it looked effortless). The descent was pretty calm again, one guy off the front but we had plenty of time to catch him on the next climb. Turning right to begin what would be the toughest climb of my life, I was mentally prepared for the worst.
My goal was to hang on to the lead group until the end, finishing result didn't matter so much, I was prepared to empty the tank to hang on knowing I would have nothing left for the end. Attack after attack, I just kept my head down and hammered, I don't really no what happened between the top and bottom but there was alot of pain involved. By the top, three guys (or so I thought) were off the front and the gap was a little too big for my liking once we started the descent. I was feeling alright so I went up front and pushed the pace, De Cal was right there and before I knew it we had a good pace train going. Spinning out our 53x11s we were determined to reel them in, by the bottom they still had a good gap so the echelon began, we didn't have much time before the end. I was cooked and screwed up the pace for a sec so I dropped back and hung on for a couple pulls then I hopped right back in, we reeled them in and the pace instantly dropped so people can recover for the sprint. I had nothing left and that didn't change for the sprint. 9th in my first S1/2 race isn't too bad at all, the form is starting to come around
Big ups to De Cal and Csikos for a solid ride
We did a bike and luggage swap with De Cal so there's enough room for me in the vehicle, we made our way over to Jamestown where we were staying. Had an awesome apple spice muffin from a bakery and enjoyed our huge selection of TV channels at the Best Western. After a delicious Italian dinner we headed out on our mtbs for a little cruise by the river. Saw a beaver, built an awesome North Shore style skinny line that we sessioned for a bit until De Cal flatted, I rode back to the room for some flat repair and we finished off the ride with some more skinny sessionning. An attempt at stretching, bed time.
The morning started off less than ideal where it wasn't for sure that we were even going, by 7 we were out the door and a little behind schedule. Got to the race site just after 9 with enough time to sign up, get the number pinned, suit up and ride to the start. I rode down the road for 15 seconds to see if my legs could even turn the crank arms, it'll have to do.
The first climb was a little bit of a shock and I decided to do a little attack and found myself off the front for a bit, once I got back in I started following everything that went and by the top I was hoping we would start going down soon because I was red-lining pretty bad. De Cal should be able to post up some better descriptions of the climb when he checks his Garmin file. It was LONG, not so much steep, there's nothing like that around here. The descent was pretty tamed and I felt like shit starting the second climb.
I survived, we'll put it that way, sat in the whole time and anyone that attacked I would wait for someone to come by and grab their wheel to bridge. The second climb was a little shorter than the first one but it was steeper because I was barely in my 39T on the first climb but I found myself in it a few times on the second climb. I was relying on a super-high cadence to hang on because I couldn't find any power. Back down and around to where we started and it was time to do it again.
The race was two laps of climb, descend, climb, descend. There was no time spent in the valley at all to get the legs ready to go up, but before starting the second lap it was flat for a k or 2. I felt much better going up the first climb for the second time, when attacks were going I felt much more responsive, De Cal was going with or shutting down anything. Anytime I would go off the front with a couple guys it was guaranteed that when I looked back it was De Cal effortlessly closing down the gap (at least it looked effortless). The descent was pretty calm again, one guy off the front but we had plenty of time to catch him on the next climb. Turning right to begin what would be the toughest climb of my life, I was mentally prepared for the worst.
My goal was to hang on to the lead group until the end, finishing result didn't matter so much, I was prepared to empty the tank to hang on knowing I would have nothing left for the end. Attack after attack, I just kept my head down and hammered, I don't really no what happened between the top and bottom but there was alot of pain involved. By the top, three guys (or so I thought) were off the front and the gap was a little too big for my liking once we started the descent. I was feeling alright so I went up front and pushed the pace, De Cal was right there and before I knew it we had a good pace train going. Spinning out our 53x11s we were determined to reel them in, by the bottom they still had a good gap so the echelon began, we didn't have much time before the end. I was cooked and screwed up the pace for a sec so I dropped back and hung on for a couple pulls then I hopped right back in, we reeled them in and the pace instantly dropped so people can recover for the sprint. I had nothing left and that didn't change for the sprint. 9th in my first S1/2 race isn't too bad at all, the form is starting to come around
Big ups to De Cal and Csikos for a solid ride
We did a bike and luggage swap with De Cal so there's enough room for me in the vehicle, we made our way over to Jamestown where we were staying. Had an awesome apple spice muffin from a bakery and enjoyed our huge selection of TV channels at the Best Western. After a delicious Italian dinner we headed out on our mtbs for a little cruise by the river. Saw a beaver, built an awesome North Shore style skinny line that we sessioned for a bit until De Cal flatted, I rode back to the room for some flat repair and we finished off the ride with some more skinny sessionning. An attempt at stretching, bed time.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Papa's like a rolling stone
Pap's has informed me that he's on the fence about staying over in Jamestown tomorow night, like it would be better to come home and go back again Sunday morning at the crack of dawn. I'm not down for that at all, I should use the "I just went to the bike shop and paid for your bike (minus his deposit)" line but I want to keep that a surprise for when he picks it up.
Now I can get started on turning his 1972 steel framed bianci in to a singlespeed/fixie with a small gear to build up some leg speed. By get started I mean most likely pay someone to do it and teach me as they go along. Should be a pretty sweet ride.
Yesterday's ride hurt a bit with some sprints and attacks and whatnot, my top end decided it wasn't going to come along with me for the ride so the sprints were slow and painful. It's all good though, I feel pretty recovered today and hopefully when I wake up at 5:45 tomorow morning I feel ready to race S1/S2. It should be a good workout trying to keep up with the big boys, looking forward to it. STXC in the afternoon will be a fun time, last year Chown won by 2 laps on his cx rig, someone has to push him for at least a lap or two.
Hopefully the rain holds off for both races but if it were to rain for one of them I'd pick the road race because after KW, I feel pretty confident racing on slick roads. I'm still a plug when it comes to racing on slick rocks and roots, hopefully a week of riding Buckwallow will change that. More on that later.
Good luck to everyone racing this weekend.
Now I can get started on turning his 1972 steel framed bianci in to a singlespeed/fixie with a small gear to build up some leg speed. By get started I mean most likely pay someone to do it and teach me as they go along. Should be a pretty sweet ride.
Yesterday's ride hurt a bit with some sprints and attacks and whatnot, my top end decided it wasn't going to come along with me for the ride so the sprints were slow and painful. It's all good though, I feel pretty recovered today and hopefully when I wake up at 5:45 tomorow morning I feel ready to race S1/S2. It should be a good workout trying to keep up with the big boys, looking forward to it. STXC in the afternoon will be a fun time, last year Chown won by 2 laps on his cx rig, someone has to push him for at least a lap or two.
Hopefully the rain holds off for both races but if it were to rain for one of them I'd pick the road race because after KW, I feel pretty confident racing on slick roads. I'm still a plug when it comes to racing on slick rocks and roots, hopefully a week of riding Buckwallow will change that. More on that later.
Good luck to everyone racing this weekend.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Earthquake
Apparently we got hit by an earthquake today, supposedly around 2, I was probably holding on to the weedwhaker so there's no way in hell I would have felt some little vibrations when my teeth were already chattering from la machina.
Brought my wheels in to Liberty! since some of the spokes on the non-drive side were like noodles and I'm also missing a spacer. I acquired some new blisters on my thumbs from peeling off the tubular, I must be getting pretty good at gluing them. I've only done it about 6 times so far this season.
Easy ride today, nothing exciting at all.
It looks like the plan to buy De Cal's sexy wheels fell through but I'll most likely buy the rims and throw those on the XT hubs (the rear needs a new freehub body) that way I can ride tubeless as I await for a set with hubs that have the missing R.
Brought my wheels in to Liberty! since some of the spokes on the non-drive side were like noodles and I'm also missing a spacer. I acquired some new blisters on my thumbs from peeling off the tubular, I must be getting pretty good at gluing them. I've only done it about 6 times so far this season.
Easy ride today, nothing exciting at all.
It looks like the plan to buy De Cal's sexy wheels fell through but I'll most likely buy the rims and throw those on the XT hubs (the rear needs a new freehub body) that way I can ride tubeless as I await for a set with hubs that have the missing R.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Soy Milk
Just having a big bowl of vector cereal with a cut up banana at the moment, I can't really taste the difference between regular milk and soy milk so that's alright I guess.
I finally made my way out to Woolverton today for the first time since March or April, I wasn't expecting to climb much today since Max said he wanted to go for 140-150km steady. I'm glad we somehow came to a workout plan that included a few escarpment climbs because I wanted some sort of comparaison to my early-season form.
We kept a good pace heading out, caught a good draft off a small school bus for a while but he turned left and we were heading straight, very sad. Got to the bottom of Woolverton in under 2 hours, first climb is always the worst. We stayed along the top to Hamilton, down and up Fifty, felt very good. Pushed a good pace and didn't feel any weakness sprinting up the last switchback. The roads were a little damp so I was a little nervous heading down but all went well. We thought there would be less wind at the bottom so we stayed down to get to McNeily, there wasn't any less wind. I was surprised the rain was holding off for so long, just a few sprinkles here and there but nothing compared to what those massive black clouds could unleash. I pushed a little too hard at the bottom, had a massive gap on Max but by the last switchback he had realled me back in. I still had enough left to upshift and sprint over the crest, I wasn't feeling too bad at all.
We made our way over to Dewitt, the bottom part of the climb was through a subdivion, Dewitt itself is a one way street so we stayed up top until New Mountain. Just before heading down the rain had started and it was coming down hard, the drops actually kind of hurt. Both climbs were pretty similar, no big pitch changes just steep the whole time. Now we were stuck in the middle of a storm somewhere in Hamilton with very little fluids left in the bottles. Made it to Tim's in Smithville on fumes and refuelled before making our way back home. The rain stopped for a bit and it got warm for about 18 seconds then the rain started again. Shorts and T was still a good choice because it was pretty humid.
If we would have gotten out a little earlier I might have tried to head over to the tuesday night race but we got back at 4, a little too late. Now that I think of it, I don't think I would have even had the legs to make it out to the start line after that 5h ride. I love days off work, tomorow isn't looking like it's going to be one. That's cool, easy distance anyways.
I finally made my way out to Woolverton today for the first time since March or April, I wasn't expecting to climb much today since Max said he wanted to go for 140-150km steady. I'm glad we somehow came to a workout plan that included a few escarpment climbs because I wanted some sort of comparaison to my early-season form.
We kept a good pace heading out, caught a good draft off a small school bus for a while but he turned left and we were heading straight, very sad. Got to the bottom of Woolverton in under 2 hours, first climb is always the worst. We stayed along the top to Hamilton, down and up Fifty, felt very good. Pushed a good pace and didn't feel any weakness sprinting up the last switchback. The roads were a little damp so I was a little nervous heading down but all went well. We thought there would be less wind at the bottom so we stayed down to get to McNeily, there wasn't any less wind. I was surprised the rain was holding off for so long, just a few sprinkles here and there but nothing compared to what those massive black clouds could unleash. I pushed a little too hard at the bottom, had a massive gap on Max but by the last switchback he had realled me back in. I still had enough left to upshift and sprint over the crest, I wasn't feeling too bad at all.
We made our way over to Dewitt, the bottom part of the climb was through a subdivion, Dewitt itself is a one way street so we stayed up top until New Mountain. Just before heading down the rain had started and it was coming down hard, the drops actually kind of hurt. Both climbs were pretty similar, no big pitch changes just steep the whole time. Now we were stuck in the middle of a storm somewhere in Hamilton with very little fluids left in the bottles. Made it to Tim's in Smithville on fumes and refuelled before making our way back home. The rain stopped for a bit and it got warm for about 18 seconds then the rain started again. Shorts and T was still a good choice because it was pretty humid.
If we would have gotten out a little earlier I might have tried to head over to the tuesday night race but we got back at 4, a little too late. Now that I think of it, I don't think I would have even had the legs to make it out to the start line after that 5h ride. I love days off work, tomorow isn't looking like it's going to be one. That's cool, easy distance anyways.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Lake to Lake
Rolled in at HH Knoll for 10:15 and got a good warm up in, shot the shit, the usual pre-race stuff. I lined up at the front and was ready to go, the start is always sketchy and today was no different, starting with an old lady driving through the intersection then stopping as she saw the group coming towards her. The look on her face was priceless. Some guy was trying to take the smoothest line on the road by avoiding all the cracks and sewers and almost took me out, not 10 seconds later did I hear that awful sound. The same sound that was produced during the finishing straight at Good Friday, carnage. These things happen and are very unfortunate, however, they are very avoidable. Let's not get into that right now.
So I continued on in the hopes that everyone was OK, I didn't bother looking back because I didn't want to see it and to stay focused on what was in front of me since that probably shook a few guys up. Wow, just over a paragraph and I didn't even take the first turn yet. Going through Port I was sitting 10th or so and once we got on the gravel stretch I was shelled and hopped on the next group of guys. Worked with them for a while going in to the trails and back on to the gravel along the canal until DeBoer attacked and I tried to respond. Even though I never bridged, it ended up being a good move because I had dropped that group and was chassing for the next. I caught them and passed before heading into Mosquito Alley which was a total shit show and gave me flashbacks of last year when I ran the whole section and gained 2 spots.
The Coach and his boss gave me a bottle just after the train bridge and I was on my way chassing down the next train, thanks a bunch. I couldn't bridge on the road but once we got in the trail I was making good time and caught them before leaving Allanburg. Got a good cheer from Boston Marathon star and long time friend Al Deschamps (blog on right) which got me pumped and ready to rock. My cleet had been loose for a while but it was starting to get really bad and I was trying not to think about it coming apart on me. Our group was working well together and eventually reeled in Rahim, I attacked a bit later and held them off until the singletrack, I was told my 2km/h pace was a little slow and tried to ramp it up a bit resulting in a body check to a tree and a headbutt to his friend across the trail. No biggy, Rahim and I managed to get away and were riding strong going down the escarpement.
After Suzanne's we saw Trevor Montague up ahead and started to hammer to catch him, this is where the race got interesting. So Trevor is about 10-20s and we can see he's hurting, I'm on Rahim's wheel and as the gap starts closing I crack. No soon after Rahim cracks as well. You know those long ass boxing matches where the fighters are giving it their all at the end but the punches are just so weak because there is pretty much nothing left in the tank? That was how the chasse was, 3 guys within 10s of each other pushing hard but making up no ground at all.
Ian from The Hub catches me and we work together to get to Rahim, for about 3s we were all together, then back to the boxing match but this time between four guys. Although Trevor was out of sight, maybe he wasn't hurting as bad as we thought. Final road section was a blur, coming up to the final descent I seen De Cal and pointed to him with a nod because he was already changed so I assumed he had finished on the box where he belongs, little did I know he was in that first crash. Heal up quick buddy.
The Flying Frenchman, JC Roberge was also involved in the crash as well as Jenny Brown. Very unfortunate, I hope the healing process goes quick.
I made a goal for top 15 and came 13th, can't say I'm unhappy. It was a good day for my paps too who won the 444 fishing derby. Happy father's day to all the paps out there.
Here's a good one, so my mom parks in some dentists' driveway that she knows who lives real close to the finish. She leaves her keys with him so he can move the van when his wive gets home. We get back to the van and there is a note written on the windshield, the windshield of the van with my bike, my mom and aunt's purses as well as a few more valuables: "Hi... Keys are in the mailbox - had to leave for a bit" with his signature at the bottom. Nice, even after 14 years of schooling some people just never quite get it.
So I continued on in the hopes that everyone was OK, I didn't bother looking back because I didn't want to see it and to stay focused on what was in front of me since that probably shook a few guys up. Wow, just over a paragraph and I didn't even take the first turn yet. Going through Port I was sitting 10th or so and once we got on the gravel stretch I was shelled and hopped on the next group of guys. Worked with them for a while going in to the trails and back on to the gravel along the canal until DeBoer attacked and I tried to respond. Even though I never bridged, it ended up being a good move because I had dropped that group and was chassing for the next. I caught them and passed before heading into Mosquito Alley which was a total shit show and gave me flashbacks of last year when I ran the whole section and gained 2 spots.
The Coach and his boss gave me a bottle just after the train bridge and I was on my way chassing down the next train, thanks a bunch. I couldn't bridge on the road but once we got in the trail I was making good time and caught them before leaving Allanburg. Got a good cheer from Boston Marathon star and long time friend Al Deschamps (blog on right) which got me pumped and ready to rock. My cleet had been loose for a while but it was starting to get really bad and I was trying not to think about it coming apart on me. Our group was working well together and eventually reeled in Rahim, I attacked a bit later and held them off until the singletrack, I was told my 2km/h pace was a little slow and tried to ramp it up a bit resulting in a body check to a tree and a headbutt to his friend across the trail. No biggy, Rahim and I managed to get away and were riding strong going down the escarpement.
After Suzanne's we saw Trevor Montague up ahead and started to hammer to catch him, this is where the race got interesting. So Trevor is about 10-20s and we can see he's hurting, I'm on Rahim's wheel and as the gap starts closing I crack. No soon after Rahim cracks as well. You know those long ass boxing matches where the fighters are giving it their all at the end but the punches are just so weak because there is pretty much nothing left in the tank? That was how the chasse was, 3 guys within 10s of each other pushing hard but making up no ground at all.
Ian from The Hub catches me and we work together to get to Rahim, for about 3s we were all together, then back to the boxing match but this time between four guys. Although Trevor was out of sight, maybe he wasn't hurting as bad as we thought. Final road section was a blur, coming up to the final descent I seen De Cal and pointed to him with a nod because he was already changed so I assumed he had finished on the box where he belongs, little did I know he was in that first crash. Heal up quick buddy.
The Flying Frenchman, JC Roberge was also involved in the crash as well as Jenny Brown. Very unfortunate, I hope the healing process goes quick.
I made a goal for top 15 and came 13th, can't say I'm unhappy. It was a good day for my paps too who won the 444 fishing derby. Happy father's day to all the paps out there.
Here's a good one, so my mom parks in some dentists' driveway that she knows who lives real close to the finish. She leaves her keys with him so he can move the van when his wive gets home. We get back to the van and there is a note written on the windshield, the windshield of the van with my bike, my mom and aunt's purses as well as a few more valuables: "Hi... Keys are in the mailbox - had to leave for a bit" with his signature at the bottom. Nice, even after 14 years of schooling some people just never quite get it.
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